Email, WordPress, FB…the amount of “spam” infiltrating people’s feeds is insane.

It’s a new day. You’ve got your beverage and electronic device of choice. You sit down on the couch/at the table/on the balcony and fire up said device. What do you find?

30 emails telling you the following: You’re a flaccid black Jewish woman in need of a loan to buy lasik to see the road to the new house in your new car, because Adriana sent you a FB mesage about sexy mail-order Veterans performing background checks on you – and they want to give you $6,499 if you reply in 20 minutes.

14 WP posts by the same person claiming to be the Messiah of Assholedom, and he wants to show you just how much of an asshole he really is. Anther 9 WP posts by a woman who is, in her opinion, the premiere authority on all things Wicca. Unfollow and unfollow.

37 FB posts suggesting you like and visit their pages based solely on a Google search you did 4 months ago. For book research. Thankfully, nobody can see that you Googled “how do i make poison brownies” or “how long does it take for snake venom to kill a person”. The incognito search option would be a good call. This can benefit you in a number of ways. Specifically, if you need to hide the fact you like porn – and you opened that FB message from Adriana.

Adriana is basically a spammification tool. She emails you from “Facebook” and details her dimensions, likes, dislikes and I think a couple times there was a phone number attached. That handy little preview feature will let you see this. Don’t be an idiot and open the email. There’s likely an FBI surveillance code embedded in the email’s body, allowing them to turn on your webcam and cookies so they can track your every move. You know, in case you’re building a terrorist cell.

Where is Charles Epps when you need him?!

I’d love to hear about the spam you see in your feeds. If you want to share, please comment below 🙂

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