So, it’s been a pseudo productive first 12 days of 2014. I made headway on “Rising”, “EQ”, started the Imbolc story, made some personal development gains and got some more Timing feedback. There were a couple of days last week in which I did not write (personal reasons), but over all I feel pretty good about the direction everything is going.
Its been pretty cold, and while it warmed up this weekend I’m still missing the electric blanket in a big way. Cold office does not equal wanting to write, yet this is the only place in the house I have any semblance of quiet when people are home so I bundle in my 12 layers and snugglechoke the coffee cup.
And speaking of my office – I got it back! The kids got tablets for Christmas which means Lil Dude allowed me the desk. I discovered a correlation between productive writing at the desk versus the love seat. While the love seat is comfy, it increased physical pain and sucked me into unproductive mode. Not good, or healthy.
This weekend is the WriYe Challenge weekend. I signed up and went with the 2,500 words option. Yesterday I got in 1277 and worked on “EQ” for the majority of it. I accidentally killed off a character. I mean, I’d thought about killing him off way back when, but the way the scene developed…it just kinda happened a bit earlier than expected. It did open up other possible story lines, though, so I’m going to see where it goes. I should be able to get some mileage out of that. It’s possible there will be a shift in perspective as a result. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but I at least recognize it could happen and need to be careful how it transitions.
On the days I miss or don’t make count, I end up second guess myself and wonder why I’m writing. Then I question my ability to get any project done. Period. Yes, I’m that person. Then I get a metaphysical Gibbs smack and reaffirm that I can do this thing called writing and I will be at least somewhat good at it. I’ve no illusions about my ability so I don’t equate myself to, or predict I will become, the next JK Rowling or Danielle Steel. Yeah, I may have high hopes for a reasonably successful writing career. What writer doesn’t? I’ve just taken a realistic approach and love the fact that 14 people bought my book.
There’s also the lack of Multiple Personality Disorder/Schizophrenia combo I haven’t had since writing the ending to Timing. While its disorienting and freaks me out, it’s necessary. Looking back at Timing, the ending is by far the most intense and “complete” piece of the book. I’d love to have the experience for each WIP but I’d need a hefty dose of meds after each writing session. How do the Big Name Writers do it? Constantly keep that pace?
Sure, I get ideas frequently and I put them aside for another time. If I didn’t I’d have, like, 231 WIPS going all the time. Wouldn’t be able to keep things straight on the page or in my head.
But to write at that level? I won’t say I’ll “never” make it. It just won’t be in the immediate future. And that’s perfectly alright. We gotta crawl before we can walk, and I’m definitely in that rocking stage. Testing the waters. It will come when it comes.
I mentioned the end of December about a possible grand deal for Timing – doubt that’s going to happen unless I foot the bill myself. Once the book is updated to reflect various fixes, I may have a handful printed for a select few: Mom, Cupcake, BFF, etc. However, that’s a few months out, yet.
I’ve learned a lot with Timing, and I’m grateful for each lesson. Another reflection I’ve had is because it wasn’t the genre I read, it gave me more of a challenge and let me explore possibly farther than had I started with a fantasy novel. That may sound really weird to some, but to me it makes so much sense. Having the relationship aspect take center stage allowed me to look at the various dynamics and even my own personal pairings (in their different forms, including non-romantic). So, really, it was a type of living lesson as well.
That leads me to something else: Living Lessons. They’re not Life Lessons, because to me Life is static. Living means ongoing, doing, growing. There have been several events over the last several months which have prompted me to change the way I look at Life and Living, and the differences between the two. Those same events have provided me to be me, a novel concept (ha!). A few declarations have been made, all of which have been taken rather well so far.
I guess maybe the point I’m making today, across the board, is to be Living and not just Live. Writing provides me with a way to get all that chaos out in the “open”, put wants/needs/desires to paper and foster them in a way I understand. Because, and here’s some insight to Me, there are days I don’t make sense even to myself. Using writing as a therapy tool has proven highly beneficial – why do you think therapists always say “Write it down”? Some of us can’t talk about it, so we write.
And why, when you think about it, do certain scene in books feel more powerful than others?